Hi Blog family,
I’m on a quest to be more patient and to deal more productively with my frustration triggers, so I’ve been doing some research to help myself out.
Last week I talked about how I recognize when I’m frustrated and what my particular warning signs are. It may seem easy, but figuring out the physical manifestations of my irritation was the first step toward me putting a halt to my reactionary behavior.
So, I get a tense feeling in the right upper quadrant of my abdomen and my temperament approaches the boiling point. I’m upset. I implement my five steps to help prevent me from saying or doing something I cannot take back.
My next step is to pinpoint exactly what is frustrating me. What is the trigger? What belief do I hold that creates sensitivity to the trigger?
Too often I lose my cool and fly off the handle. Blame pours through my brain like a monsoon. One thing leads to a whole slew of things I had repressed.
A more productive response to frustration triggers is necessary.
Isolating what specific behavior bothers me has two benefits:
- I see what event is the trigger
- I can identify patterns among my triggers to find the root cause
For example, I drove to work and another driver refused to let me merge onto the highway. I became upset and yelled at said driver in my car.
Entitlement. I feel I have more right to the road than they do.
Intolerance. Everyone should drive as well as I do.
Tremble and do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent. Offer the sacrifices of the righteous and trust in the Lord (Psalm 4:4-5 NIV).
This practice of pinpointing my frustration triggers is akin to searching my heart.
What inside me does God need to mend?
Where did I veer off, believing what culture tells me instead of what God teaches?
I need to go to God in prayer, meditation, or quiet reflection to help me overcome my sense of entitlement and intolerance. Neither of these attributes were taught or revered by Jesus, and they are not things I value in my heart.
Actions can be reflexive. While God continues to work on my heart, I’ll work on identifying my frustration triggers. Over the next two weeks, I’ll go over steps I can implement to break my reactionary habits.
What are your frustration triggers? Let me know in the comments.
Until I figure this out, let me merge for crying out loud. 🙂